Surreal
by Nao K. Kawasaki
Summary: Hermione and Ron were happily together, but Ron was cheating... well Hermione thought so anyway. Maybe it was all part of her dream. Songfic to Hamasaki Ayumi's Surreal. Rated for language.


_**Surreal:**_

_Song lyrics by Hamasaki Ayumi_

_Charecters belong to J.K. Rowling_

_Story belonging to Nao. K. Kawasaki (me)_

Hermione burst into her heads common room sobbing. Even though she was Head Girl, Ron didn't seem to care ebough to congradulate her. This bothered her to no end, and when she brought it up, all he would do was glare at her.

It turned out that Ron, yes, good little Ron, her best friend, her lover, was cheating on her. Not with just any other girl, at that. It had to be Lavender Brown, the girl that was immensly stupid and dense when it came to Hermione. She never paid any mind to her and Ron, maybe Lavender thought that they were being dared to kiss eachother like that so much? Out in the open at that?

Hermione collapsed into the chair seated by the fireplace, not even hearing her counter-part, the Head Boy come into the room. She continued to weep, and she eventually fell into an uneasy unconciousness.

_Choosing only the things you like  
isn't irresponsible.  
If you can't find anything you like  
then why accept the responsibility?  
I take only the possibilities that I'm ready to accept._

Hermione wanted Ron. She wanted him to love her because that's what she'd come to expect. She'd come to expect that Ron would love her forever and a day, because he had loved her for the entirity of their freindship. In one way or another, she'd expected the two of them to get through anything. She lay in that chair with her eyes closed for an extreme ammount of time, just wallowing in self-pity.

But when she got sat down to think about it, Ron really wasn't that great of a boyfriend in the first place! He was rude to the extreme, he swore, he got into fights, got detention, got bad grades... ...Gackt there was nothing that was to appeasing about him when she thought about it.

_If it's something you don't need then  
compassion is of no use at all.  
If it's something important then  
pain will probably accompany it.  
Loneliness that you feel together is worse  
than a loneliness that you feel  
by yourself._

So why did she still kinda want him back? Maybe it was the sudden withdrawl that she had gone through. He had place so much distance between himself and her it was unreal. Maybe that was why. She had been by his side since their first year. Harry's as well, but he hadn't even tried to get into an intimate relationship with her as Ron had gone to great lengths to do so.

Hermione concluded that she didn't want stupid Ron back. He could go fuck a monkey for all she cared. And that's all he wanted, was a fuck-buddy. He didn't want a relationship. He wanted someone to fuck. All he wanted! She was infuriated when she discovered this. He wanted someone to fuck because she didn't have sex with him! Well excuse her for not wanting to get into that type of relationship yet! Gackt-damnit! "BOYS SUCK MONKEY BALLS!" She yelled, to no one in particular. It was then that she noticed that she had gotten back into her personal bedchambers, clothes still on, mind you. But she was placed under the covers to keep from the cold, which she thought odd. How did she end up there? Her first thoughts jumped to Harry or Ron, but the didn't know the password to the head's dormitories.

_No matter what loneliness comes,  
no matter what pain you feel,  
you mustn't close your eyes to it.  
Because even if you lose all your  
words, even if you say it doesn't matter,  
if you stumble, it will be there to help you up.  
That's what kind of thing it is._

No it wasn't Harry, nor was it Ron that placed her into her comfort zone, also known as her bed. It wasn't them, she knew it. She had been dreaming with this thing about Ron cheating on her, and she would wake up in the morning and everything would be fine.

But that next morning she awoke and found that there was an owl waiting for her. It was Pig, Ron's owl at that. She didn't even open her eyes to know who's owl it was. Pig swooped down, noticing that Hermione had opened her eyes. He dropped a small letter on Hermione's chest and flew out the opened window. Hermione didn't even sit up to open it and read it, she stayed down, just in case that "dream" that she had last night really happened.

_Ah, that promise we made that day.  
I don't want to keep it by myself.  
Ah, that far off dream we talked of throughout the night.  
I don't want to make it come true by myself.  
I can't tell anyone. I want to tell someone, that  
that person is more important to me than anyone else._

The dream wasn't a dream, apparently it was a reality. Ron really was cheating on her with Lavender... this letter was the break-up letter, explaining that he didn't even want to be friends anymore. Hermione wasn't shocked at all, to her surprise. She was actually relieved that all this was finaly spilling out. She had had quite a few dreams of realization the past night, and she had discovered something through those dreams that Ron would never believe, espeically since she didn't really believe in divintaion.

_la la la-  
In a nonexistant place  
I stand as I am.  
Please be yourself.  
That's how I want you to be._

She didn't long for Ron, ever again. These dreams made her realize her longing for someone that Ron would never allow her to have. The feelings that she has felt for the Head Boy. The person that even though he says that he is a cold hearted ass hole, and acts like it as well, brought her to her room without making jests at her.

_la la la -  
In a nonexistant place  
I stand as I am.  
Please be yourself.  
I want you to be that way forever. _

"Head Boy," she thought, "I'm coming to find you." Little did she know that the person that she was looking for was sitting in her room, in her chair at that, fast asleep. He was intending to keep an eye on her, make sure that she didn't try to kill herself, but he fell asleep in the process.

FIN


End file.
